A Pineapple for Posterity’s Sake Post

Here we are again, dear reader…if you are out there…since I’ve been neglecting you…

Anyway, Pineapple is getting super big. She’s ginormous now (all 27lbs of her) and she has opinions that are just as big (OK, bigger). She’s been super busy – we all have – and she’s had a lot going on. Lately, I started to realize I’m not documenting her happenings quite enough…so I’m going to correct that now.

Here is what’s going on in Pineapple World (didn’t you know? she’s CEO, President, and dictator…just go with it):

Pineapple recently had her adenoids removed and ear tubes put in. The reason we decided to go ahead and do this was because Pineapple is now 2 1/2 and drools as though she were teething molars…she’s had all her teeth for over a year and to be quite honest, I was tired of being “slimed.” When we took her in to figure out what was going on, the doctor realized her hearing wasn’t normal. When we saw the specialist, we learned that her ears were constantly full of liquid, ergo all the ear infections, and therefore her hearing was being affected. We also discovered that the drooling was a result of her constant mouth breathing (something I thought she got from her Dad’s side…just kidding MIL, love ya!) but apparently this was happening because her adenoids were so swollen that she couldn’t breathe properly through her nose. After seeking the advice of a few doctors, the consensus was removal of adenoids and insertion of tubes, so we agreed. The surgery was FINE – for anyone who is staring this one in the face and wondering “should we do it?” it was cake. The anasthesia on the other hand was a swift kick in the ass. It totally sucked – Pineapple is what is commonly referred to as “combative” when she awakens from anasthesia…this means that she woke up like a firework going off, hit, slapped, and screamed at all of us, threw her passy and her pillow across the room, then tried to chew off her IV. They had to knock her tiny butt out again so we could gather our senses and prepare for round 2…which was just as bad. It took her several hours to come out of it…and my thought the entire time?…”does this mean that she will one day be an angry drunk?! Is she gonna be “that girl” at college parties?! Oh Lord, help me…” Anyway, she came through it fine and with the exception of some really terrible breath right now (I mean seriously, we thought she was pooping her pants – it’s that bad), she’s doing great and the drooling has nearly stopped! 🙂

Pineapple has decided that dancing is her “thing” and she totally rules at it. She can pirouette, plie, do a grande jate, and an arabesque (I am probably not spelling ANY of that right but c’est la vie). She also has discovered Yo Gabba Gabba and rocks out constantly. She always wants to play music and anyone around her is encouraged to “you dance now!” It is adorable!…and exhausting. I’m so sick of dancing. I cannot even tell you. And if I could get my hands on that damned Angelina Ballerina, she wouldn’t last 5 seconds. My husband and I actually catch ourselves singing songs about mousling slumber parties (Oops, it’s almost mi-id-night!) – GROAN. We also know the Camembert Cheer – which we all perform on a regular basis. But dang…she is so cute when she dances…until she starts…AHEM…”dirty dancing.” I do not know how else to put this…but my kid will twitch and shimmy and rub her hands on her tummy and in her hair then flop down on her back in a spread eagle, grabbing her self in TOTALLY inappropriate ways. Our friends were over for brunch with their kids a few weeks ago. Their 3 year-old son and Pineapple were having a total dance party on the ottoman and Pineapple started into her move – I screamed at her to stop but she kept going – and our friends stared on in horror as our sweet Pineapple did her best exotic dancer impersonation – it was mortifying – and made worse when the father instructed their son to “look away.” Yes, it was hilarious…yes, it was mortifying…but I’m keeping stock of moments like these and fully intend to bust these moves out at one of her highschool parties…PAYBACK; she is the bitch, no?

She shares so nicely. There have been so many occasions where she has happily shared a baby or a stuffy or some other little thing she is playing with and she always stands patiently waiting for the item to be returned. The only time I ever saw her nearly lose her cool was at the doctor’s office. We were waiting by the fish tank, Pineapple clutching her little mouse stuffy, when a little girl toddled up. She looked at Pineapple’s mousy and held her hand out. Pineapple passed the mouse over and then just stared as the girl hugged and cuddled her beloved stuffy. She didn’t do anything or try to take it back – she just stood there. I only saw her become anxious when the little girl walked away with it and Pineapple looked at me, hand wedged in her mouth, with big eyes saying “ummm…she’s totally stealing my stuffy.” Thankfully, the little girl saw what had transpired and had her daughter give the mouse back – at which point, Pineapple grinned ear to ear and hugged the crap outta that thing. She didn’t let it go again the whole visit and slept with it that night…I suppose the near loss of her stuffy made her appreciate it just a bit more. Of course her “huggy” suffered as a result…but only for that night.

We need to get this kid off of passies. She has gotten to the point where she has a color preference. She goes and gets them out of the kitchen drawer and she’ll put a blue one in her mouth, take it out, see the color, proclaim “YUCK” then fish around for another…until she gets the one she wants, which is typically pink. Apparently, pink and orange taste great but green and blue? Not so much. I’m considering explaining to her that with spring coming soon, all those baby birds will need passies…I wonder if she’d buy that….

Same goes for the pull-ups, which are essentially just diapers with princesses on them. Pineapple was summarily dismissed from her preschool’s potty training program after one week. Why you ask? Ohhhh….she started screaming when asked if she wanted to go potty and would FLING herself onto the floor, exclaiming “I wanna diaper like a baby!!!!!” Oh yeah…it was bad. She still gets all teary when we ask if she wants to go potty. Basicallys he has to initiate it – but what I have noticed is that she runs and hides when she has to go #2…she’ll hide behind the curtains or a chair or some other thing and won’t make a peep until she’s done. I’m thinking maybe we’re getting close again…fingers crossed!

There’s so much going on right now…I need to add more information to this soon – hopefully sooner rather than later.

In the meantime, Pineapple says “byebyeIluvyounightnight” – and so do I. 🙂

XOXO – Rachael

One thought on “A Pineapple for Posterity’s Sake Post

  1. bluebayou says:

    You have to wait for just the right moment for the ” Mommy Bird took your Passie for her Baby Bird ” to work.
    There has to be a flock of Birds and you have to get her so interested
    in them she drops ” it ” and you quickly hide it.
    If you assure her the ” Baby” needs it, she’ll really want to help the Mommy bird appease her baby, And make sure she knows what a generous pineapple she is for sharing and caring for one of Gods tiny
    creatures.

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